Where does the time go?

That's a question everyone usually asks themselves. However, it may be one that widows/ers ask themselves far too frequently.

For example, Pablo and I were together for 8 1/2 years (yes, that 1/2 is very important to me!). 8.5 years can seem like a long time, but poof! it's gone, and now it seems like an absurdly short time. It's been 20 months since he died. Some days the time seems like it's d r a g g i n g. However, most days, it feels as if the time is just hurtling by, to some unknown date in the future.

20 months. With no idea of what awaits in the future. Might as well be in jail. At least there, you're counting down to something. Some days, I feel as if I'm just biding time. Biding time till what you ask? You tell me...