The oddest thing happened the other day. I usually ask Baby Girl "Where is papi?" to make sure she recognizes her father in photographs, and when I do, she usually just points to whichever picture is closest and responds "there he is." However, the other day, she answered differently. When I asked her, she replied that he was "in the rainbow". I don't know where she came up with it. But it brought tears to my eyes to hear her say that. I don't know why exactly. Maybe it's because I'd like to imagine he's somewhere up there, watching down on us from his perch on a rainbow. Or maybe it's because I want to think that Baby Girl's imagination is now developing to the point where she can "explain away" where her "Papi" is.
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I went to the movies last night to see "Knocked Up." I really needed to just laugh for a few hours. Why in the world did I end up crying during most of the second half? Actually, the weird thing is why I'm so surprised that I cried during a movie about pregnancy, knowing that seeing the stuff play out would affect me. I really could've used him around for the last two months.
Whenever I see Baby Girl, I just wish desperately that he had seen her. Once at least. That he could see the wonderful little child we created together. That he could enjoy her like I do.
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